MAKE SPACE

by Patricia Usiobaifo

God has impressed upon me the need to create “space” (and time) in my life, for my husband who is soon to join me here in Australia.

We have been friends for over 6 years now, and married for almost seven months, however we have only spent 2 short weeks together(in the same nation) since becoming husband and wife.
Creating a physical space for him in my world will be by far the easier aspect of this entire “space” concept. Wardrobe space, drawer space, bathroom space, space for all his “stuff” may be slightly challenging for me to relinquish, but in all honesty it will be of no significance compared with creating a ‘Space “in my life for this precious man.

In order to even receive your partner you must first make space in your heart, to accommodate their love for you and indeed your love for them. God enlarges your heart, stretching it at times to what feels like breaking point, but through that stretching and enlarging your heart is also strengthened. Just as most things in God are a paradox: you find yourself feeling so incredibly vulnerable and yet it is in that overwhelming vulnerability that you find strength. Our hearts can be full of pride, offence, grief, disillusionment, disappointment, hurt etc. layer upon layer of self-protection and emotional debris that we are not even aware of. Residue of past relationships and hurts can remain as a subtle yet insidious film through which we perceive reality. We are wise to seek counselling and healing from our past, it is imperative; however, I have also come to understand that the true degree of our deliverance can rarely be tested and measured outside of intimate relationship.
God (in His kindness) magnifies every flaw in our thinking, attitudes and beliefs when we enter into covenant relationship. He highlights every area of un-wholeness in order that we can continually be adjusted and refined, dismantled and restored.

Like any solid building project this takes time, planning and precision; a joint vision, as well as patience, tolerance and sacrifice. It is a labour of love.

It is not enough to simply accommodate a partner or integrate them into your family, social circles, church or ministry etc. you must rather create a “space “where they can find their true place; a safe, secure space (and time) in which God can slowly and painstakingly lay the foundations for your marriage /union in Him; a foundation that will be sure and solid, designed specifically for the scaffolding and building which is to  take place as you both map your future together in God.