STAY TRUE

by Patricia Usiobaifo


I was speaking recently with one of the most important people in my life and during the course of our conversation they asked me to make them a promise. After listening to their request I had to tell them that I could not make the promise they so desperately desired. I understand their need and their situation, and there was nothing wrong with their request, however, I had made a promise before God which was in opposition to what they had asked. I knew my friend was so very disappointed and that they were feeling hurt, maybe even slightly rejected. My only recourse was to explain that I had made a promise to God and ask them to consider, if I have given my word whether to God or man and I then broke that word, how could I ever be trusted again? How could I be viewed as a person of integrity? How could they as a friend trust my given word knowing that I had compromised myself for their sake? Our conversation ended with my friend having nothing further to say, their disappointment and disapproval evident in their silence. Their friendship is incredibly important to me and I knew that my response to them had put that relationship at risk; however, I felt I had no choice, how could I break a promise made before God? Some 48 hours later, my friend called and apologised to me for their response. They said that as they meditated on what I had said, it had pierced their heart like an arrow and that they knew that honouring my word was a huge part of who I am, and again that they were truly sorry. I am so incredibly grateful to God for the outcome; however, I needed to be prepared to risk the friendship for my convictions. God in His mercy sent His Holy Spirit to whisper into their heart and for that I am so very grateful and I know our friendship is stronger than ever because of it. Had I give in to their needs in order to protect our friendship I would have lost respect for myself and  also eventually their respect as well, and eventually our relationship would have unravelled . We will always be to some extent misunderstood, only God can possibly fully understand us and know the true motives of our heart, don’t be tempted to go against your own beliefs and convictions to please another, despite how much you love them, eventually it will lead to loss, if not of their love and friendship then of your own self-respect. Shalom.